God is so good

So many things have happened recently, that I felt I could not just post the list in the "praises" column. I have to give you more details!

1. Last week was so interesting with the "different" accommodations when I went down to chemo. I was not familiar with this floor of the hospital at all, so it could have been quite stressful. However, God was so good in keeping me at peace. Maybe I've actually learned a little bit from His lessons when I had to be on Ellison 14 with Jason! Wouldn't that be cool?! I'm hoping it's long-term learning, and I'm thankful because I know the Source of all my peace, thoughts of looking to God's purposes in the change of plans, and ability to laugh instead of cry in frustration.
2. I wasn't sure what this week was going to hold as Aunt Carol needed to stay in NH. I had e-mailed Jason about going down with me, but I suspected that he had some scheduling conflict because of the youth group he leads on Wed. nights and the short notice. (Jason is the speaker.) Sat. AM, I went to a women's get-together, and my friend Nichole gingerly approached me about whether she could go to Boston with me (concerned that she not make me uncomfortable). It was an answer to a prayer before I even prayed it! So, Jason will stay with me Tues. night (as Nichole has work commitments on Tues.), and Nichole will stay with me Wed. night. Isn't that cool?
3. I avoided a blood transfusion last Monday, but I believe I'll need one this week. This is probably good timing in that I'll be at the hospital anyway and can have the transfusion between treatments (since it's not methotrexate this week). That sure beats spending an additional 4 hours away from the kids!
4. God sent me some encouragement last night through a conversation with a friend that I don't get to talk to all that often. It was such a pleasant surprise that she shared with me how God has used our situation to draw her closer to Him in prayer. This totally touched my heart, both what she said and that she shared it with me.
OK, gotta go get Anderson at kindergarten.

Boston Update

Well, it's 11 pm, and I've been struggling to maintain a good attitude. At this point, the situation is just ridiculously funny...to the point where if I start laughing about it, I might cry. So, here's the scoop.
I'm on a different floor than ever before because the other floors are all full. (Way to feel special, huh? I can't complain though; they're letting Aunt Carol stay here, which is not common practice.) My first nurse made me very nervous. I coached her through the pre-chemo steps and tried not to notice her apprehension or shaking hands, all the while praying. I ended up not being accessed until 3.5 hours after I got here, and at that point, the hydration was not the right solution (too low a percentage of sodium bicarb). So what does that mean? I'm just starting chemo now (2.5 hours later) because my pH hasn't been high enough (since my body had time for it to drop back down after the pretreatment I took at home). So in spite of my best efforts - like being assertive in making sure they activated me right after I got here - I'm still getting treatment in the middle of the night. Ugh. The good news is that I have a different nurse who I am more comfortable with.
OK. Now let's talk about the accommodations. The room is very small, which is fine except that we're supposed to fit a cot in here. You should have seen me and Aunt Carol trying to figure out how to rearrange the room - "interior design at Mass General" - so that we could fit a cot as well as have room for me and my IV pole to make it to the bathroom a million times during the night. We finally decided to move my bed over, after about 5 minutes of trying to figure out how to take the brakes off. Oh yeah, and we're still not sure how we released them, but the brakes are back on. Speaking of bathrooms, like the room, it's teeny. I can barely fit me and my IV pole in there at the same time. No shower either. It totally reminds me of a bathroom on an airplane, just slightly larger.
So, yet another adventure in chemotherapy. At this point, it doesn't really take me by surprise. God is still in control, regardless of how it feels. And who knows? Maybe the middle of the night treatment won't hit me so hard this time. If it does, God will pull me through. At the very least, these are good memories with Aunt Carol.

Medical Update

Last week, I had methotrexate and it looks like I will again tomorrow. Aunt Carol is my traveling companion. 8) I am so thankful to report that I have not gotten mouth sores...thank You, God! I also had a bit more energy on Sat. and Sun., enough to socialize a bit. It was like a breath of fresh air to be able to hang out with friends. The sunshine sure felt good too!
My dr. thought that I would need a blood transfusion today, but I didn't! My count was 27, which is reasonably good considering everything. So, that was a nice surprise, getting to spend the second half of the day with the kids instead of in the hospital.
I have been very encouraged to know that I can count my remaining treatments on 1 hand. Getting closer!

playing

Here is a photo from last Monday. My dear friend, Candy, spent the day with us and helped me bring the kids to the park after kindergarten. The kids love climbing on these wood structures at Roger Allen Park, and it was great spending some more active time with them before I went back for treatment. It was a beautiful, sunny day. Thank you, Candy! I could not have done it without you!

Ethan can sleep anywhere!

Ethan has fallen asleep while bouncing in the Johnny Jump-up, continuing to bounce periodically. He has fallen asleep while being held standing up in my lap. This is a time that I caught on video...so cute!

Wonderful Visits of Encouragement

I have been so blessed to be surrounded by such a great network of family and friends, and even strangers.
I don't think that I blogged about this already, but I could be wrong. Anyway, it's on my heart again. Around the half-way mark of chemo, I really wanted to do something to celebrate. My first thought was to go North to Pittsburg, but that just wasn't best. I ended up without an idea of what to do. Well, God took care of it; I didn't need to plan anything. I had some very special visits right around that time that really boosted my spirits - seeing Gram H., Aunt Paula, Jen, Aunt Carol; a visit from Aunt Deb, Uncle Denny, Grammie C.; another visit from Aunt Cheryl, Uncle David, and Whit; a day-long visit with Ryan (my cousin) and his family from Kentucky joined by Jason and Dawn; a visit from my cousin Karrie and her family; as well as the regular summer visits of Beth Anne and Dave, and Denise and other wonderful friends who live nearby. What better celebration could a person have?!!! It was great.
More recently, I had another very special visit. "The great aunts" took an excursion to come see us, and boy, did I feel special. The photo below shows the crew - (back row, left to right)Grammie, me, Aunt Norma, Aunt Geneva, (first row) Aunt Katherine, Lyndsey, Aunt Hilda, Aunt Betty, and Aunt Margaret. The set of older women are all sisters-in-law, married to the Covill brothers (except for Aunt Geneva who is Grampa's sister). How special that this group of ladies piled into the mini-van to spend a day on the road visiting us, and doing a little shopping. 8) I really enjoyed the visit (and, I got to see Grammie twice in 1 week!). Lastly, a quick story about a stranger. My friends Julie and Tim (from college days) have been faithfully praying for us. Tim's job puts him in contact with tons of people. He met a man, John M., who lives in Ireland and whose wife is fighting cancer. He and Tim talked about me back in March/April, and John said that he would be praying for me. His and Tim's paths crossed again more recently, and John remembered me, asking how I was doing and saying that he was still praying. Isn't that amazing how God is demonstrating such lovingkindness in that He continually reminds people, even strangers, to pray for little ol' me?! God is so good.

Cycle 4 - Big Guns Treatment

I am so behind on blogging but am going to try to catch up. Two weeks ago, I went to Boston for my "big guns" treatment after a forced week off for my body to rest. My brother Jason drove me down and stayed, and God sent just the right person to accompany me. We knew when I headed out that I would not be staying on my normal hospital floor with the nurses that I've been working with over the last 4 cycles. However, I was told that the double room I would be staying in would not include a roommate so Jason could stay. I was still feeling kind of bad about this; I wasn't going to be in familiar surroundings with nurses who have become friends. I was wondering why God would allow this additional trial, and then He reminded me, "This isn't all about you." I realized that perhaps there was somebody new that I was going to meet that God would enable me to encourage...maybe a nurse. (Ironically enough, less than an hour later, Jason pointed out the same thing.)
So, when we arrived at Ellison 14, it was so different from what I am used to...much more hospital-like. Poor Jason didn't have anything but a chair to sit on; he used my bed for a footrest. My nurse was really nice and had been working oncology for 12 years (a blessing as I was comfortable with her administering my chemo...Thank You, Lord). And I also found out that I was going to have a roommate. Jason ended up sleeping in the lounge on a cot, and he was so gracious about this. My poor roommate was having a lot of cancer-related issues that they were trying to figure out and was in a lot of pain and very weak. We were able to talk some, and because I had such energy, I was even able to help her. Sharing a room with her also helped me take stock of my situation and realize how fortunate I am. She will be battling cancer for the rest of her life, off and on. I don't believe that will be the case for me.
The most amazing thing about the whole trip was that I took the chemo so well. I got out of the hospital 1 day early, and I was even able to walk out to the parking garage! This hasn't happened since my first big guns treatment. Praise God! I was exhausted the next 3 days, but I didn't have any nausea and was able to eat decently...truly amazing.
So why was Jason the perfect companion for this trip? Well, I certainly appreciated the great conversations that we had. How often do you get to spend lots of hours on end together, allowing for conversation beyond the "quick catch-up" to happen. This was a blessing. Also, he was so easy-going about us having to fly by the seat of our pants and not having comfortable accommodations. I knew that he really didn't care, so I didn't worry about it. So, this was a memorable chemo trip.

my friend, Laurie

I have been blessed. My cousin-in-love introduced me to a new friend last March, Laurie. We quickly became dear to each other as she shared with me in our experiences with cancer and more importantly, our love of God. God used her to encourage me, continually drawing my eyes to Him and giving me a prayer partner. She was/is such a treasure, radiating Christ's light and love. What I find amazing is that even after her death (about a month ago now), God is still using her to impact me. I still think of things we talked about, words of encouragement she shared, and the spiritual legacy that she has left behind. I pray for her husband, Greg, and their children as even though they know Laurie is now in the best place ever, they miss her terribly. I highly recommend that you read the blog entry that can be accessed by this link. It is BEAUTIFUL, not a bit morbid. What perspective.

http://upapaddle.blogspot.com/2009/08/most-beautiful-bride.html

Photos

The kids are getting big, and I thought you'd appreciate these photos. Lyndsey was thrilled to be able to hold Ethan (while not sitting on the couch). Her confidence about what she can do with him, e.g., standing up, scares us. In the bottom picture, she was helping Anderson hold Ethan. Note the outfit she is wearing, particularly the shoes; she has quite the sense of style! Anderson was a little worn out from his first real day of school, which explains the look on his face. It's been an exhausting week for many of us.

First Day of School

We went to Orientation for Kindergarden on Monday. Anderson was apprehensive but also excited. He said that he stopped feeling nervous once he realized (in the classroom) that he already knew who his teacher is. (He had talked with her at the screening.) He was very well-behaved and attentive. It was great to see the other kids he'll be in school with.

He also showed us a new trick. He went across the monkey bars many times...so strong and steady. I enjoyed watching him confidently figure it out. His repetitions reminded me of when he had just learned to walk and discovered the ramp at church. Back then, he practiced walking up and back down the ramp until he was satisfied that he could do it well...practice, practice, practice.Here is a picture of his first day of school without parents. He and Dakota waited for the bus at the end of our driveway. (See how big his tomato plant is that Uncle Jason gave him? We've enjoyed lots of tomatoes.)Anderson boarded the bus without even looking back. He's such a big boy! He learned that the bus ride to school can be VERY noisy. Day 2 on the bus wasn't as disorderly. We thought mornings might be rough for Anderson as he likes to sleep in. He has been doing a FABULOUS job getting up with the alarm and tending to business so that he can meet the bus. He's very tired this week, but we know this will all soon be old hat for him.

What do the rest of us think of all of this? I'm amazed that I haven't felt really sad. I can't believe I have a child in school, but I am really excited for Anderson's new adventure. The challenges of helping him process what socially goes on at school are interesting, but God is guiding me and Bob through it. We're thankful that Anderson is so open about what he's experiencing. (The poor kid has to tell his stories twice as Bob wants to know all the details after dinner.) I've really enjoyed time with Lyndsey one-on-one. This is a new and much-needed opportunity, particularly in light of all the chaos of the last few months. Tomorrow, we're going to the library, and Lyndsey keeps asking if Denise will come too. She can't imagine going to the library without Denise. 8)

Teeth

Anderson lost his second tooth while I was at chemo, the week before he started school. This one he was brave enough to pull out! He saved it on the windowsill until I got home (more because bed time can be so hectic than for my benefit). The tooth fairy rewarded him with $1!